Outrageous Drug and Alcohol News Stories of 2015 (Thus Far)
We’re at the end of September and National Recovery Month for 2015- a month-long celebration of overcoming substance abuse, those who have, and those beginning the journey. This month Harbor Village has participated by hosting a recovery-themed photo contest with great prizes and our blog has featured entries exploring multiple facets of addiction and recovery. We have not, however, touched the funny side.
Yes. There is a funny side.
As a firm believer that humor heals and finding it in even the most unfortunate circumstances can be benefit everyone, I offer to you a few of the outrageous drug and alcohol news stories of 2015 (thus far).
And of course we begin in Florida- Tampa Bay to be exact. An unnamed couple (not pictured) the best way to end a night of drinking and gambling at the casino was with a nap…inside the dumpster behind the place. They were rudely awakened when a dump truck arrived for pick up, dumping the couple and the contents of the garbage container into the back of the truck. Luckily for them the truck’s operator heard them screaming and banging on the side of the truck and was able to call for rescue services to dig them out. The couple was taken to a nearby hospital complaining of “back pains.”
I mean…that’s one way to get trashed.
This one happened recently, on September 25th in Madison, Wisconsin. An encounter on West Gorham Street ended with a man being beaten unconscious- not funny. The man required stitches and reportedly his teeth were broken in the assault- still not funny. When he regained consciousness, the drunken 25 year old told police he knew who his assailant was: a hippopotamus.
Yep. He was so drunk and disoriented that he thought he was a being attacked by a hippo. That’s funny.
There was no doubt this story would make it onto my list, it’s too crazy not to. And of course it’s another one straight from Florida.
James West was under the influence of the extremely dangerous street drug and suffering from extreme delusions and paranoia: he believed he was being pursued by several cars and his solution was to seek solace in the Fort Lauderdale Police Department. The problem? The doors were locked. So West kicked and pulled at the doors before resorting to using large rocks and sticks to break the glass. He managed a crack before running away, which makes no sense if you’re looking for salvation. He didn’t make it far before getting arrested. No sign of the cars he was “fleeing” though.
Maybe it’s the way they’re shaped; maybe it’s the bright red paint…maybe 45 year old Englishman Paul Bennett can just blame it on the alcohol.
Even though this technically happened last September, I’m including it because the story was only reported as of January this year when Bennett faced charges for his one-night stand with the inanimate object. Also, the mental image is hilarious.
Bennet’s trouble started after an argument with an unidentified woman. When she walked away, he reportedly exposed himself and began ‘performing sex acts’ on the mailbox all the while screaming “wow” and otherwise carrying on. An innocent bystander was deeply disturbed by the display and called the cops, pressing charges against the 45 year old. Bennett eventually pulled his pants up, swung around a lamp post for a bit, and examined his reflection in a store window before apparently deciding to expose himself again just in time for the cops to appear.
Know any outrageous stories we missed? Tell us about them in the comments below!
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About the Author
Alexandrea Holder is a South Florida native working toward double Master’s degrees in Psychology and English. She finds the psychological aspects of addiction and mental illness fascinating, as both are prevalent in her family’s history. When not researching and spreading addiction awareness, Alexandrea enjoys sparring, artistic pursuits, and admiring puppies online.